Dear Big Y,
I love you. It's true. Our affair started a long time ago, when I was born in your hometown of Chicopee, Massachusetts. For a long time, you were the only grocery store I knew. Sure, my mom sometimes visited other stores, tempted by promises of lower prices and coupon tripling. But she always came back, and I (almost always) stayed true, unless I was living in some area where you just wouldn't come.
Besides being from the same town, we have so much in common! I love grocery shopping, and you're a grocery store. I don't like big chain stores, and you're a local, family-owned company. I love being organized, and your aisles follow logical sense. I mean, at least you don't think pasta is an "International Food!" I like to be friendly, and your employees are very friendly. I especially like the guy who wears the newsboy cap at your Manchester branch, not to mention the fact that you have employed so many of my students over the years. I like to do most of my shopping in one place, and you not only offer a pharmacy, but you even have a branch of my bank inside your store. That's my bank! See, it's destiny!
Then, about a year and a half ago, we broke up. I was upset about those bad clams you sold me, those green beans that were soggy the day after I bought them. Your prices seemed a lot higher all of a sudden. You never, not even once, gave me a gold coin. I had to leave. For six months or so, I was seeing another store. I was lured in by the promises of lower prices and discounts on gas. It was awful. I couldn't find anything! The butchers wouldn't give me any recipes! They didn't even sell Appian Way pizza kits!
Luckily, my mom told me you were starting to come around, to change to the way you once were, so I decided to give you another chance. You know what? You are the best you've ever been! Since I've been back, your produce has been consistently fresh and crisp. Your seafood always tastes just-caught, like you say in your commercials. Your butchers are so nice and helpful. You carry all my favorite products and bring in new things all the time. Lately, you've been offering D'Artagnan meats in the meat aisle, things like buffalo, duck, andouille sausage, and wild boar, exotic treats that for so long I could only find online or at places like Whole
Paycheck Foods. Speaking of paychecks, both your sales and your everyday prices have been so much better lately. And, in the last couple of months, I've gotten, like, six gold coins!!!
So, I just want to say thank you. Thanks for getting back to your old self. It means so much to me that you could reflect on the error of your ways and bring us back together, the way it's meant to be. Keep it up, and I promise never to cheat again. From my family to yours...
P.S. Happy 75th Anniversary.
P.S. Happy 75th Anniversary.